Thursday, April 27, 2023

No Spring Chicken

 


No one I knew was really talking about aging seriously, but then again, who do I really talk to that much where I'd be having any serious conversation about that? B and I get up every day with our aches and pains and just kind of joke through it. Stuff was getting real though when I got these beautiful new comforters for the bed - two separate because while B and I sleep in the same bed, we don't share our blanket. I spent a little more this time because our comforters were almost sixteen years old and from sending them to the cleaners, they weren't holding up well anymore. 

Well. I'm inching closer to fifty and I was starting to feel like it was Africa hot in the bed every night. I started opening windows, with the fan on, and I started waking up in the middle of the night, sweating. One night, I grabbed one of E's old bed-in-a-bag cheap $25 comforters that he used for his first year of camp. It was light as a feather and felt like heaven. 

As far as exercise- I don't go to a gym but I walk every single day. I barely even drive. I don't go on the treadmill like I used to for an hour or hour and a half a day, but I do get up to anywhere from twelve thousand to twenty-something steps a day. It's not like I'm sedentary. I also barely eat during the day. Yeah, yeah, I know that you still have to eat. I'm busy and it takes awhile to jumpstart my eating during the day. I'm not trying to starve- I just don't think about it first thing.

I started getting Factor meal delivery to manage my dinner portions and not have to deal with dinner for myself. I can get out of control if left to my own devices. Had Jenny Craig not closed my closest center, and then continuously discontinued my favorite meals, I probably would've stuck with it forever. It was SO easy. I get Factor meals for dinner and maybe eat some Raisin Bran at some point during the day and/or a Zone Bar. I don't really snack during the day. I do, often, have brown bread (The Cheesecake Factory rolls) and butter with my Factor meal and I do have dessert every night. Usually a big cookie and milk. Then, I do eat candy in bed. Like, sugar candy- gummies of some kind. Gummy bears, blue raspberry licorice. or whatever. 

It's not like I'm sitting around on my ass eating bon bons all day. I'm active. I feel like I have to be able to live a little and enjoy some cookies or some candy. I didn't even gain weight during the pandemic. I lost weight. I wasn't having to get up so early, pack a bag of food for work, so I was just naturally eating less. Something about the past year inching toward forty-nine though, I am just gaining weight. I thought it must be pre-menopause kind of stuff. 

I saw a post on my local moms group the other night about this. So many women I know were coming out of the woodwork with the same issues, complaints, aches, pains and weight gain. I was like, okay, it isn't just me. There were so many books, life coaches, websites, webinars, that were recommended, that while I know people meant well, it was too overwhelming. Honestly, I also have the attention span of a fruit fly and I don't want to read a book or watch a webinar. I know myself, what I'm willing to do and my level of participation.

Of course I've seen all the chatter on TV and online about OzempicMounjaro and Wegovy. Who wouldn't be curious. I didn't know if I'd be able to get it because of insurance. Last time I went to the doctor, in November 2022, which I wrote about, she told me my BMI was higher than she'd like but I didn't have diabetes or anything. I'm one of those people who fall into the zone of holding on to extra weight but not enough to qualify me for anything, or so I assumed.

I did a little research on the three wonder drugs that all the Real Housewives seem to be on. I messaged my doctor and asked if I could have a scrip for Mounjaro. She said she'd put it in but it would be likely my insurance would deny. They did. There is no rhyme or reason to what they approve and deny. She then put in a scrip for Wegovy, which is Ozempic for people who don't have diabetes and just want it for weight loss. Surprise of all surprises, it was approved!

It was approved, but of course CVS was out of it on Tuesday. I was on a bit of an emotional rollercoaster. I wanted to do it it but there was definitely a bit of nerves. Now I had to psych myself up to do self-injections? What, now? 

CVS texted me yesterday, Wednesday, and said my Wegovy was in. Alrighty. I messaged someone I know who has been on it and she gave me some tips. She told me she takes it at night in case there is nausea, she'd sleep through it. I figured I'd try the same thing. 

I went to CVS and picked up my box of four needle pens. I read the directions. I waited until midnight - not for any reason except for that being a normal time I go to sleep. I went into the bathroom, wiped an area on my belly with an alcohol swab and followed the directions for injection. 

It wasn't hard and it didn't hurt- just a small pinch. Of course I was like, omg, I think I might feel nauseous. I don't think I really did though. I just went to sleep. I was really tired. 

This morning, it's almost nine o'clock and I feel fine. I don't feel hungry but I never do in the morning. I'm a little afraid to drink my Crystal Light because it has fake sugar in it. The person I spoke to who is also on Wegovy said I'd probably feel crappy and maybe have gastrointestinal issues if I had too much. I guess that's how you make better food and drink decisions while on this to aid the weight loss - out of fear. Good, old fashioned fear of throwing up or worse. 

I'm going to chronicle my use here for anyone interested. I want to lose about twenty five pounds in total. I see people online in my Bergen County Moms group who get crazy when someone asks about going on any of these three drugs. There is so much judgement- I don't know if it's out of jealousy, fear of doing it themselves, not being able to do it because of pre-existing conditions, being in the MLM diet biz- I have no idea. But there are definitely haters. There's a lot of the following when it gets brought up:

You'll have to be on it for the rest of your life, if you go off it you'll gain it all back, do it with diet and exercise, talk to this MLM bullshit coach and do xyz expensive program instead, you don't know what could happen, do intermittent fasting instead, you don't know what the side effects will be down the road, etc etc etc. I saw someone I know say something negative and my first thought was - Bitch, you're maybe a size 4 and you've never had an extra pound in your life. You're the same size now you were in high school. YOU. DON'T. KNOW.

Some of us are willing to try stuff and see what happens. I'm one of those people. For those of us that weight has always been an issue- we're in a club we don't want to be in. Some of us ruined our metabolism in the 80's/90's/00's with over the counter weight loss drugs - like Kelly Taylor on 90210. Stackers, Hydroxycut, and I can't remember the other big one when I was in college or just after. And then with Phentermine and other prescriptions, yo-yo dieting, starving, and worse. Some of us need some extra help now, especially in the pre-menopause stage of life. 

I'm always game to try something. I told the good, bad, and ugly all about my mommy makeover sessions about five or so years ago. I'll do the same here. Hopefully there won't be too much bad or ugly. I'll let you know.... 






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