The REAL In & Out Burger

Photo from Shake Shack site but this is NOT what our food looked like!

Happy New Year! I just wanted to get that out of the way. I didn't write through the holidays because, well, I wanted to do as much nothing as possible. I also can't really write when I'm home. I don't know why. I'm better when I'm at work. Now, I'm back at work and I thought I'd be able to write today, but so far, it's been a no-go. Awesome that we're super busy, but I've barely read my emails, let alone get any of this out. Here I go again...

I think I've written that we almost always go out to dinner on Saturday evenings, with Ethan. My babysitters are hitting fifteen and sixteen and they have better things to do on Saturday nights than sit in my house. B works on Saturdays and E and I are always running around all day. So we don't even mind just doing a low key dinner thing at The Cheesecake Factory or wherever. We decided this past weekend to go to dinner on Friday, because we actually had a sitter coming on Saturday so we could see a movie.

Coincidentally, we tend to run into our friends Melissa and Rob, in a decent amount of our Saturday night eating establishments choices. We seem to enjoy the same food. The wait was too long for them in Grand Lux Cafe, where our wait for a table was almost up. They mentioned Shake Shack and that they like it a lot. I think that was where they decided to go. They made it seem like it was delicious and we were missing out for not trying it out. It's just that for me, dining out usually needs to consist of a bread basket and a burger joint is not a bread basket type of place. When given the choice, I'm always picking the kind of dinner that involves bread.

E asked to go out to dinner on Sunday. We'd already gone to Grand Lux and then B and I had our movie date. We didn't want a whole big, expensive, dinner out thing for Sunday. Plus, we didn't want to be in a restaurant forever with school looming the next day. But it's not like I was planning on cooking anything, so I said- "Let's try out Shake Shack". Granted, yes, we're late to the whole Shake Shack craze. It was there when I worked in NYC but I never ate there. I've seen the lines out the door. And, while I will goof on Rob and Melissa for their love of this place, they're certainly not the only people who extol it's virtues.

WELL. I will no longer be calling it Shake Shack. It's now Sh!t Shack. Yup. I'm not going to get graphic, but let's just say, while I was eating it, I actually said to myself, "I think I will probably get sick from this". When two out of three of your party NEED any public bathroom available after eating somewhere, it's safe to say, it's not getting a five star rating from us. However, had that not happened, it was basically glorified fast food that cost a fortune.

I actually try really hard not to write negative reviews. I usually will just not write anything if I don't like it. Especially with mom & pop small businesses. I was at a new-ish mom & pop bakery that I didn't write about. The service was bad and the food was just okay. But they're new, are probably having some growing or newbie pains, and I will revisit in a few months. I may still not like it, but I won't write about it because I'm sure they're trying and no small business needs help making it fail. But Sh!t Shake is different. They should have a standard that's higher, especially because they always had a good reputation.

I ordered a double cheeseburger with bacon & fries and a small fountain diet Coke. I ordered a single cheeseburger for E, fries and milk. B ordered a cheeseburger with mushrooms and a bottle of water. This all cost around $35. They give you a buzzer and you go get your food at the pick up area when you're buzzed. It's $35 for that, you have to get it yourself, AND they didn't hear me say that second set of fries. So it cost me that for three burgers, three drinks, and one order of fries. That's RIDICULOUS. It costs me a lot less for more food at the Windmill and the food is WAY better there. We got the food and the burgers were so sloppy. Greasy & cheese everywhere. We needed like twenty napkins between the three of us.

We left Sh!t Shack in Paramus and went to CVS in Fair Lawn. About a ten minute ride. Within minutes of arriving at CVS, that's when two out of three of us had our....attack.

My guess- when Shake Shake was small and just in NYC, they probably had decent quality control. Sometimes, when you get too big, you lose that quality control. All these expensive burger places are are regular fast food in a costume. It's really no different than Wendy's. Just packaged as more "gourmet". The gourmet burger thing became a trend. Smashburger, Habit, BUCU (now defunct Burgers & Cupcakes), Bobby's Burger Palace, etc. We have them all. There is NO difference between BBP or Shake Shack and any other fast food burger place except the cost. If you're craving a bacon double cheeseburger- don't waste your money on a name.

Melissa & Rob- we love you, we'll still take your recommendations, although Rob, I'm not sure about that show you told me about. When we do get to see you guys for dinner, we're not going back there!