Donate Blood

Yesterday was Sunday, our little family day. It was a beautiful day, sun was shining, and we did our usual autumn thing. E had swim practice, but after that, we went to an "Art in the Park" festival in one town, then hopped over to a different town for a street fair. We ate street meat, B got his new favorite vice- Fried Oreos, and I got cupcakes from my favorite cupcake truck- House of Cupcakes. We made it home, got ready for the week, and B and I looked forward to watching the new season of Curb Your Own Enthusiasm, back after six years on hiatus. It was a relaxing, yet ordinary day.

It was also the eve of my mom's deathiversary, so we happened to see and feel a lot of Rita around. She loved street fairs and flea markets. She always bought socks & dollar store items at them. There was a DJ at the street fair that was playing music my mom liked from the 80's. I actually felt pretty good- it was a nice day. I wasn't thinking about anything much beyond having to replenish my freezer peanut butter and jelly sandwiches, which also remind me of Rita.

We watched Curb and it didn't disappoint. I went to bed with a smile on my face after being in a Facebook group I'm in, where we talk about people who need to take it down a notch over minutiae that just doesn't matter in the grand scheme of life.

I wish I could go back to that hour. That hour I didn't know of the horror that was going on across the country from me.

I woke up and didn't even know immediately. I didn't check my phone first, probably for the first time I can remember, because I was in a hurry. When I got down to my treadmill and turned on the TV, I saw the news.

So many thoughts are swirling around today. First and foremost, my heart is broken for the people who died, their families, and the friends that saw it all unfold in front of them. I can't even imagine having a front row seat to that horror. I hope that there are no more casualties, and anyone who made it out, injured, makes a full recovery.

I don't know what the answer is- but I know it's not more guns. Gun control is a huge concern to me, but not something I work on changing consistently. Supposedly, the guy who shot up Mandalay Bay, at this point so far, had no motive they can find. This may change, even soon, after I post this, but for now, that's what I know. He has no criminal record, no mental health record, and no affiliations that would lead anyone to believe he could do something like this, according to his cooperating brother. No, a background check wouldn't have helped.

However- why the FCUK do we need to have these automatic weapons sold to the average Joe? That, for me, is the issue. Civilians don't need to have access to stuff like this. How come we've never heard a story of people using these assault rifles for good? Because there is no good to come from them. They're weapons for rapid destruction and death.

I've talked about this before. When Newtown happened. When Pulse happened. Who knows when else. Whenever one of these shootings happened. Yet, nothing ever happens. How is our own government so bought and corrupt that we've made a permanent bed with the NRA? How is it that our government is so chock full of people who have misinterpreted the 2nd Amendment to where they just turn the other cheek to what seems like serious, unnecessary, firearms being distributed like candy?

Last smaller shooting that happened, someone I grew up with in one of the most densely populated counties in NJ shared the video or story of the shooting on Facebook and said something like- "This is why we need to be able to conceal carry here. I don't understand why we can't! Disgusted!". Ok, the story he shared didn't happen in NJ. North Jersey (I don't know how to describe South Jersey), isn't a place with a gun culture. Kids don't grow up shooting guns. Maybe in rural North Jersey they hunt so they've been around guns, but but guns are not a THING where I grew up. It would've never occurred to any of our parents to think about or ask if a classmate's parents had guns. The first time the gun conversation even really came up, I was a senior in High School and they showed Scott accidentally get shot on 90210.

We didn't sit around shooting cans on summer days. I couldn't even tell you what a BB gun looks like. The only thing I know of BB guns is from that movie, A Christmas Story. "It's all fun and games until someone loses an eye...". 

B and I have been to concerts in big arenas and small intimate venues. We've taken E to live music in big parks and down the shore. We never thought about shooters. Even after we happened to get trapped in our local mall a few years ago because of a suspected shooter. It wasn't a shooter, so we just went on with our lives not really thinking about it.

I've been to Mandalay Bay. I've been where those people were shot. It's surreal to imagine this happening there. A shooter was the last thing I was thinking of in my times in Vegas. 

I just don't know where the pro-gun people get off ignoring the facts. They just want to say that criminals have guns no matter what, so we should be armed to protect ourselves. Like the guy I grew up with. I highly doubt he's handled many guns. I knew his parents. They weren't gun people. He's not that old. I'd bet anything, if he was in the presence of a shooter, if he had a gun, he'd be too scared to do anything, and if he did, he'd probably hit an innocent bystander. Because that's what happens when you live in a densely populated area and just start shooting. Even if you do have some experience.

Not for nothing, but seeing the stupidity and stubbornness of those same people on social media, I'm not sure they should be allowed eating utensils, nevermind a firearm. Learn the difference between they're/their/there first and then we'll see if you should be able to shoot anything.

I don't have an answer. Besides, "hey, lawmakers, DO SOMETHING!". Stop with the lip service. Stop letting money take precedence over a conscience. Stop with your prayers and tears and DO SOMETHING. Stop worrying about who is marrying whom, who's taking a knee to the flag, and what women are doing with our own bodies. Do something productive, making headway with stopping the sale of unnecessary firearms out of people's hands who don't need them. You can't get marijuana easily around the country, but you can buy an assault rifle where you buy milk and a vacuum.

Stop digging your heels in, spouting off about our 2nd amendment rights. People are dying, it isn't stopping, and it's getting worse. This isn't The Bachelor where "the most dramatic" moment is a good thing. Having to hear more than once, "This is the worst mass shooting in American History" should be the biggest motivator and realization that whatever you *are* doing isn't working. It's not good enough. I don't want to hear about praying and faith, I want to hear about getting stuff done.

I'll never be able to wrap my head around it. I shouldn't have to. I have the news on today, in the background and I'm hearing politicians saying it's not political, but it is. I has to be. In the way that I don't care whether you have an R or a D after your name. All I care about is that you're the one to do something. Something different than what's been done in the past in the wake of mass shootings. Because this one is over. The shooter is dead. His weapons confiscated. Great. That doesn't help for when it happens again. And it will. Another day, another white male mass shooter.

If you want to do something for those hurt in this shooting- anyone in the Las Vegas area, Donate blood. That's what they're asking for on the news right now. Kudos to those who bravely and selflessly helped others during this scary and tragic event- first responders- law enforcement, doctors, nurses, and regular civilians alike. Thank you for coming together, so quickly, to help those in need.