Sunday, September 29, 2024

Nobody Wants This

 


B and I just binged this new show on Netflix, called Nobody Wants This. Most the Jews I know were excited for this show or already watching and posting about it on Facebook by the day after it came out. We love a good rom-com show or movie with Jewish overtones. We don't get them often but we also don't get them often with Adam Brody and Kristen Bell. Who doesn't want a little Seth Cohen reprieve? 

 

***Spoilers below- so if you haven't watch, you probably don't want to read any further. 


Ten episodes, about a half hour each. Definitely not enough time. I love a good quickie but there's definitely not enough time to flesh out characters fully and tell a whole story in either thirty minutes or ten episodes. However, this show does do a pretty good job because of the off-the-charts chemistry between Adam Brody and K-Bell. I do feel we are getting a little cheated. Sex and the City was a half hour but we got anywhere from twelve to twenty episodes a season. I really don't understand, aside from salaries, why the much shorter format on every new show. Goof on me all you want for still watching network Primetime shows, but I want more than ten a season. Anyway, Adam and Kristen have amazing chemistry. You can totally forget about Summer and Logan. #iykyk 

 

I read an article by Evelyn Frick fact checking the Judaism through every episode of the show. I appreciate this because, while I am not religious in any way, I do know a little more than the basics, and it's annoying when a show totally disregards reality. At least do the research. Like, on Friends, Monica, Ross and Rachel were all supposed to be Jewish and there were so many bizarre Jewish errors or omissions there. I've written about this before, so if you're interested in that, just put Jewish in the search bar of my blog. I'm sure you'll find those entries. So, of course, I was waiting on Nobody Wants This for there to be some Jewish flubs. 

 

To my shock and delight, especially fact checked by Evelyn in the article cited above, there doesn't seem to be too many glaring factual gaffes. Except one. I think it was episode 7, Noah tells Joanne that she'll meet his friends at the basketball game- ON SATURDAY. He had just made a big deal about Shabbat in a previous episode and now he's playing a basketball game- with other Jews, who I assume are the same level of Jewish, on a Saturday? Maybe they're reform. And we don't know if they were supposed to be playing against other Jews, but it just seemed odd to me when there are five other days of the week they could've played, where it wouldn't have stuck out to have the big game on a Saturday. Especially if he's going for this head rabbi position. 

 

I've already read the other articles about this show, debating as to whether it plays into long told tropes of the whole boring Jewish girl vs hot blond shiksappeal.  I'm not going there. I mean, Adam Brody, Kristen Bell, that's where we are and that's what the story is about. And I like it. A lot. I'm already annoyed that we watched it just as it came out so we'll probably have to wait a whole year for another ten very short episodes. We should've waited like eleven months so we'd be closer to that season number two. 


I like that Noah surprised us. He didn't play into all the stereotypes, probably because there were only ten episodes. They had to move things along. He didn't just cave to his disapproving mom or his boss. He apologized as soon as he was called out for crappy behavior, like hiding Joanne at the Jewish camp. He actually talked about his feelings each and every time. I loved standing up for Joanne  to his mom at the family meal. Raymond wouldn't have done that to Marie - not Jewish, but same kind of stereotype. 


I did think it was weird that the family seems to be kosher, at least in the house, but then Bina ate all the prosciutto. I get that it was a leverage thing they were playing out there but are they kosher or not kosher? I would think that would be a really big deal if they're kosher in the house for her to just eat it like a racoon. I just didn't like that they chose that to make her a hypocrite over. Because it makes choosing to keep kosher seem like a throwaway thing, or not that big of a deal. Maybe I'm just being picky on this one. I just know people who are kosher and then people who are just kosher in the house and I feel like if you really keep kosher in your house, the thought of that would be really gross? One time my cousin's husband thought a restaurant put bacon in his food by accident and he freaked out. And they don't even keep kosher in the house or out but pig is strict no, in or out. I guess I just want to know what level of Jewish are they in the show. It's ambiguous I guess for story's sake and I don't like the ambiguity.


That brings me to the casting. Noah's parents are an odd choice for me. That first generation Russian thing with Bina is hard to relate to and she just doesn't seem like she'd be Noah's mom. While it does seem like they're not trying to play into every old stereotype so they didn't make her Paul's mom from Mad About You, Ross and Monica's Mom from Friends - American Jewish, miserable, etc, she just doesn't seem like someone Noah would think of as his "favorite person". They don't give her any warmth and with the lack of time, we never see any sweet moments between Noah and Bina. They just don't seem all that close or like they have much chemistry together. At least with Noah's dad, they had a genuine moment when they were all at the hospital to make sure Rebecca was okay after her fender bender with the bus. They made Bina so tough, it's also hard to understand how Noah wouldn't have anticipated the reactions.

 

I didn't think about this until I started writing but while I love Noah and Joanne together, I'm thinking they have to be playing younger since he's never married, no kids and is looking to do all that. Or, we have to be wondering what's wrong with this guy who is in his forties who has never been married, has no kids but is a rabbi. Realistically, or at least in my experience, he'd have like three kids, at least, by his age. A single woman in her forties in LA who has never been married and has no kids is more believable, because of the whole coastal elites thing of too many hot people, too little time, too much superficiality, etc. Except if they're supposed to be in their forties, I don't know how much it would matter about them being interfaith because of having non-Jewish children. Not that women in their forties can't have biological kids, but it certainly could be more difficult and it's definitely not a given. I read an article somewhere that they're supposed to be around forty, according to AB.


I didn't get the brother Sasha at first. He grew on me by the middle. I'd say it was the episode he was really high on gummies and had to help his daughter through a friend and boy problem while mom was out. I really loved the whole dad and daughter dynamic going on there. I also loathed Esther at first. I think she was supposed to be loathsome but she also grew on me. Especially in the last episode with the bat mitzvah dress. I don't like that they made her so harsh in the beginning though. I also wish they wouldn't have used her harshness in the trailer. It makes it seem like Jews are only funny or palatable on television as total stereotypes. Esther is actually nuanced, which, again, isn't easy in such a short time. She just didn't need to be introduced so harshly. 


The truth is, while some of these stereotypes are true, and someone else wrote that it might just be an uncomfortable mirror to have to look into, which is also true, it's not the whole story, and I don't recall ever really getting to see the other side played out. I've definitely heard shiksas are just for practice, which is definitely not cool. I've also been asked, heard it asked of others, when mentioning a new romantic interest, is he Jewish? To be fair though, at least in my situation, it was because of the other side, which we don't see, where the problem is being the Jew, walking into a WASP house, or an Italian or Irish Catholic situation and feeling the total frost take over. I'll never forget a teen boyfriend of mine telling me his sister asked him, "did you tell mom she's Jewish?". Neither one of us understood why. But it was a thing. It's always a thing.


The writers made Joanne's family totally devoid of religion.  They were written so kooky that Noah being Jewish and being a rabbi totally took a backseat to the idea that a serious boyfriend was making Joanne boring, less sexual, and therefore possibly ruining the podcast she and her sister do for a living. They also made Joanne, a single, dating, sexual being, in LA, so completely unknowing about anything Jewish whatsoever. She'd never been to a bar or bat mitzvah, didn't know basic Yiddish words, had no idea about Shabbat at all? So, in ALL her time in LA, she'd never encountered any Jews before? No Jewish friends? With all the sex she supposedly had and all the boyfriends, there wasn't ONE Jew in the mix? I have non-Jewish friends in the NYC metro area suburbs and they still know the basics. Even Carrie Bradshaw and friends didn't play as Jewish but they knew Jewish stuff because- NYC. Joanne clearly didn't go to Catholic school from her upbringing of no religion besides celebrating Christmas, so I just find it completely farfetched that she has no Jewish knowledge of basic things like the Sabbath.


All in all- it's a really good show because of most of the cast. I'm totally looking forward to a season 2, fingers crossed. I can't imagine it won't go forward, seeing that it seems to be a hot pick on Netflix. Even if you're not psyched about the subject matter, there has to be a little curiosity about a Veronica/Seth pairing. Maybe some of it could've come off as cheesy if it wasn't this cast, but you also can't help picturing Seth Cohen saying a lot of it and it comes off as total geek-smooth. I also love the idea of someone knowing they're too much, showing all their crazy as a defense mechanism, and finding the person that loves their brand of crazy. It's a very there's ass for every seat kind of romantic.




Thursday, September 12, 2024

Can we just talk about abortion for a minute?

 It's been a few hours since the Harris/Trump debate ended. I've been watching the pundits do their thing on CNN. Well, I have it on, but I'm not really watching, just have it on as background noise. 

There was a lot of egregious lies told by the twice impeached, disgraced felon, former president but I want to talk about abortion for a minute. He kept saying how this issue has divided the country for fifty two years and he brought the country together by bringing the vote back to the states. He got it out of the federal government. He's proud of the three supreme court justices he appointed who overturned Roe v Wade so the people in the states could vote on it. This whole topic has me unable to go to sleep.

I can't be the only person who finds putting what should be each woman's private health business up for a vote completely insane. I don't care what someone else's religious beliefs are regarding abortion. If you don't want one based on your religion- great, don't have one. But why isn't anyone saying, or brave enough to say- someone's health care shouldn't be dependent on anyone else's VOTE?? How is it acceptable to ANYONE, that your quality or allowance of care basically comes down to the good or bad luck of where you're born or where you've moved to prior to the overturning of Roe v Wade. THERE NEEDS TO BE FEDERAL LAW because you shouldn't have to move or travel just to be able to make decisions about your own body!

There are so many issues with Trump- I could never get into them all. He's the antithesis of everything I believe in, care about, want for the world we're leaving to our children. That is a no-brainer. I can't wrap my head around anyone who believes anything he says, is fine with him saying he wants to be a dictator, and all of Project 2025. But. I'm going to just stick with abortion here. Or not even just abortion, but women's reproductive health care. I'm not sure if people are just uneducated or what, exactly? Think it doesn't apply to them if they aren't of child bearing age or desire? 

Abortion. That word, I suppose, to some people, is just the image of woman, maybe young, maybe of color, poverty, slutty, who just doesn't feel like using birth control, can't keep her legs closed, and doesn't want the hassle or burden of having a baby. I feel like there needs to a mandatory re-education class for adults on reproduction and pregnancy. Because while the word, abortion, may be the same to describe different situations, abortion isn't just one kind of act. There are women who are losing their ability to ever have children because they can't get the proper care they need to save their reproductive system. They are carrying a non-viable fetus but can't terminate legally. 

Trump talked about how the democrats are radical on abortion. Democrats are allowing babies to be born and deciding to execute them on the spot. That would actually be called murder. AND THAT ISN'T HAPPENING. No one is aborting actual live born babies. As far as late term abortions- that isn't really true either. Or, at least, in the way the anti-abortion coalition and the Trump machine are trying to make it out to be. If someone gets to the last trimester- THEY WANTED A BABY. Something tragic had to have happened by that point where the FETUS WASN'T VIABLE. Nurseries have been designed and put into motion. Names have been picked. A life imagined. For any woman to have a late term abortion, TRAGEDY has struck that woman, her family, her friends.

Anti-abortionists will say that someone has to fight for the unborn. Pro-choice people ARE fighting for the unborn. To not be kept alive in a womb while in pain. Anti-abortionists say fetuses can feel pain. Well, if they are considered by medical professionals to be terminal, then anyone who considers themselves humane should want to end the pain in the womb. 

But even if you just don't want a baby, you shouldn't be forced to have one. End of story. Pregnancy happens. Even when you're careful. Sometimes it just happens. And what a woman does about it should remain between that woman and her doctor. 

I also don't understand why the common sense answer isn't just that we don't have a national religion. Christianity is the one with a problem with abortion. I'm not Christian. I don't believe anything about Christianity. Why should Christianity rule ANYONE'S health care choices who don't believe in that religion? 

It is irresponsible at best to have states deciding on what is or isn't allowed by law to do with your own body. It's completely unacceptable that a fourteen year old rape victim has to carry a fetus to term because she had the bad luck to be assaulted in Mississippi versus New Jersey. It's unacceptable the women in NJ might have to wait a month, carrying a fetus they can't take care of or don't want, to see a provider who will perform an abortion because women from other states had to flee their own state to find one to do it for them. Proper health care shouldn't be left to the luck of the geographical draw. 

Don't think this is just a woman problem either. What if you're the husband? The brother? The father? Someone you love can't get the care they need. Sometimes it's care that's life or death. Or life or death of their dream to have a family in the future. Think about that when you're voting AGAINST half the population not having a say over their own body autonomy just based on where they live.